"I ask not for a lighter burden, but for broader shoulders."

-Jewish Proverbs

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She makes my heart so heavy, she constantly causes me distress, she knows not of what I'm feeling, she wants to rip my heart out from my chest. Needless to say, she wants me dead -- later and not sooner, that's what she said. She carries so much hate, she made me sustain her cross. Sometimes I question her integrity -- whether she has one or knows what it is. But as of now, I asked nothing of this and the weight of her cross is slowly starting to get to me. 

I am not made of metal nor is my heart made of stone. I pity others especially those who have nothing at all. I've been pushed away and though it is not mine to bear, I've made myself strong enough to withstand every obstacles thrown at me. Apparently, my shoulders are tired and so is my heart; I know she's not grateful because even the blind can see how much she has afflicted me and this family.

I've been shouting at her, pointing at her mistakes but apart from having no eyes, it also seems that she has no ears. She lives in her own world where all she sees are people pulling her down; but like I said, she has no eyes and has been blinded by her misfortunes that she cannot see nor comprehend that the only person hindering her from living the life that she yearns is herself.

The lies that she made, the lies that she said, the lies that I believed are the same lies that destroyed her fate. She blames me and everyone else who doubts her; she thinks she's miserable but no one is to blame but herself since she constantly flushes her life down the drain. No one wants a liar especially someone who lies just to seek for attention. 

In her own little bubble, she believes she's perfect -- too perfect that almost everyone exiles her. Until now she has not realized that she's weaving a very tangled web. She pushes people away and does not even realizes it. She hurts them without a hint of regret. She acts like nothing has happened. In my eyes she's slowly falling down the abyss.

TTFN.