life has indeed given me more than my fair share of pain and lies. no need to keep the truth away from me. i will know it eventually. it's good that i knew it beforehand. it's good that you don't have to lie to me anymore. just when i thought life has given us a second chance to test the emotions we are having for each other. again, i was the one to blame for suddenly disappearing just like that. it was all my fault. yes, i am taking the blame.

i'm not mad that you didn't tell me the big news. what i'm having issues about is how you managed to tell me that we could have something real this time. i was bothered for days coz i was unsure of what i have gotten myself into again this time.

but now, there's no need for me to think about our situation anymore. you yourself has given me enough answers i needed to know. i get it. you're getting back at me for what i did to you 4 years ago. my apology was really sincere. i never intended to hurt you and i never intended to leave you but i did and i am really sorry.

so, i guess this is finally it. our story ends here. no more fooling and lying around. i have my ways. i don't actually have to search for it to know. i don't chase the news. the news comes to me. goodbye... forever.

as much i i don't want it to end like this, i have to. i don't want to be the 'second choice' anymore. i'm through with all that BS. like i said, i want someone NEW to hurt me --- or make me happy. not someone from my past and if it was, i wasn't expecting it to be you. sorry, but that's the truth.

i was actually forcing myself to forget everything that happened between us. but i just can't. it sucks, really.

TTFN