let me take you back 4 years ago.


I met this guy at the mall with my friends. i had this superficial feelings for him. it was no big deal really. then, a friend of mine gave me his number. so, i sent him a text message. we're not really text mates at that time coz unlimited texting didn't exist.

i kept seeing him at the mall with some of his friends. there was this one time he asked me to go out with him and his friends. with hesitation, i said "NO." i regretted by not saying yes. i should've come with him. :(

couple weeks have passed and i saw one of his friends. he was the boyfriend of my ka-barkada. we had a talk. i asked him about "tyler" and he told me the nasty things tyler said about me. which of course is not true coz he barely even knows me. it took me a very long time to figure out that he lied to me.

i never bothered to talk to him since then.

back in 9th grade, i got a hold of his number again. i tried texting him using my friend's name. very lame.. i know. let's just say i misled him. i lied to him, pretended to be something i'm not. out of guilt, i made up a story. told him that my friend got a new number and i'm now using her old number. he fell for it.

we got really close. he said, "YOU'RE THE ONLY GIRL I TELL EVERYTHING TO."
we talked on the phone almost everyday, he tells me about his life, problems and whatever is inside his brain. he looked out for me. it was as if we were a couple. i thought we were going there but i was wrong.

he got himself a girlfriend but our closeness didn't end. it's as if he has no girlfriend at all. i even know him more than his girlfriend does. she doesn't even care for him. there was this one time he asked me to call him. it was like past twelve and i called him up right away. he was crying because of his girl and i was the one comforting him.

our communication didn't stop until june of 2006.

he was gone since school started. then, my friend told me if i know anyone named "tyler." i said "yeah." then she told me how tyler talks about me with his friends. she also told me that she thinks he likes me or something.

he came back months later but only for three days.

college came and i'm having a blast. since i came from an all girls school, it was new to me having guy classmates. well, not really new since i hang out with my guy friends every dismissal time since i was in 10th grade. well, you get the point.

he came back into my life again. it was like the old days. he was single. i said to myslef, "this is it. he will fall for me AGAIN."

wrong. so wrong.

he kept on mentioning this girl. since he mentioned her name, i did everything i need to know about her. this girl and i go to the same school together.

TEXT:

CHAM: any plans for tomorrow?
TYLER: yes, in fact i'm going to your school.
CHAM: really? why is that?
TYLER: it's the capping of MY DARLING.

i cried myself to sleep. I'M SO STUPID.

the next day i went to school, went to the guidance office since my friend is working there. i was like really really sad. for me, music is my therapy. whenever something bad happenes to me, i instantly bring out my ipod and listen to music. that's what i did.

one of the counsellors noticed my sad face. then i asked him, "sir peter, can i have a counselling with you?" then i poured my heart out. i was crying hard. really hard. since i usually joke alot, i told him, "look! you made me cry! each tear costs 1000 pesos! you owe me BIG!"

after all the drama, i went to class.
we only had 1 class at that time since our teachers don't feel like teaching. (this happened on a tuesday. i think.)

a week before, one of my classmates told me he makes such incredible mixes. so, i scheduled a drinking session with him. he was the bartender of course.

since we only had 1 subject (we knew about this a week ago), we went drinking with my "bartender" classmate. i called him to pick us up from our school. then we had our drinking session at my classmate's house. i was drunk.

this was the day i drowned all my sorrows away and i decided to move on.

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